"Our village is pretty quiet, but we try to be helpful to outsiders. A man drives up to our street in a car with Berlin plates. He gets out, and, spying me, comes over and says, 'Sir, I'm a stranger here and don't know my way around. Could you direct me to the nearest hotel?' 'Sure,' says I, 'Go as far as the butcher's mother-in-law's place, turn right at the former baker's, and it's kitty-corner from the schoolmaster's garden shed.'"
-from a local caberet show